“Things do not change; we change.”

Henry David Thoreau 

A new year is a time for reflection. Over the decades, my image has morphed many times. My hair, my shape, and my clothing have gone through various changes that coincided with my age, the era, and my activities.

I came into this world almost bald and soon sprouted light blonde curls. My shoes were white lace-ups and patent leather Mary Janes. I wore pastel rompers and pinafores in warm weather and snowsuits with mittens and muffs during snowy New York winters.

My elementary school years saw my hair turn to strawberry blond. It was no longer curly but had a slight wave. My mother curled my bangs with a non-electric curling iron heated on the stovetop. My school uniform was a dark green jumper and a white blouse with a Peter Pan collar. When our class went to church, I also wore a dark green beret. For dress-up, I wore a wool coat, a dress, white gloves, patent leather shoes and ruffly white socks. On special occasions like Easter, I wore a straw hat with flowers on the brim and a fresh, pink carnation corsage that my uncle would always have delivered. During those years, I took, piano, ballet, and tap dance lessons. Piano required no special dress unless I played for a school assembly which required the green uniform. The dance lessons were short-lived because I wasn’t very good, but they had me outfitted in leotards and ballet and tap shoes, plus a tutu for an occasional recital. In eighth grade, I took my first sewing lessons at a Singer Sewing store and made a cotton dress with a fitted pink and white stripe top and a gray flared skirt. 

My high school years brought no respite from a dark green uniform and white blouse, and dark green loafers were an added requirement. The uniform skirt had to be below the knee. It was the only time in my life that I cut my hair short, an experiment that was not flattering. My senior yearbook picture is cringeworthy. I went to a couple of proms. My hair was styled with hairspray, I wore heels, and my dresses were full-skirted with lots of crinolines. I played tennis during those years, and all-white outfits (t-shirt, short skirt, socks, and sneakers) were required on the courts. For Friday-night dances, I often wore wool pencil skirts and wool sweater tops.

During the Sixties, my hair was long to my shoulders, straight, and parted in the middle. The color was light brown that had a reddish tinge in sunlight. I wore what I thought was the height of New York West Village fashion: miniskirts, dangly earrings, big round sunglasses, and a second-hand fur coat from a thrift store.  One bridesmaid gig required a full-length, midnight-blue velvet sheath and pinning my long hair in an updo topped with a velvet pillbox hat.

During the Seventies, my hair stayed long, and I wore bell-bottom pants, headscarves, and slim-fitting midi dresses, sometimes accessorized with a purple and pink suede belt hung with fringe. I also wore polyester pant suits with blouses that had over-sized collars. For dressier occasions, I wore wool suits with flared skirts or shift dresses. My wedding dress was ecru, full-length, silk chiffon. As a young suburban mom, I lived in casual clothes, mostly shorts and one-piece swimsuits in summer, and jeans and sweaters in cooler temps. I took up running in those years, so I wore running shoes with shorts and tees. When it was cooler, I wore track suits and beanies. For day trips to the mountains, I wore hiking boots, shorts, tees, and a backpack, and I started skiing with all of the needed equipment: long underwear, wool socks and sock liners, turtlenecks, fleece tops, ski pants and jacket, neck warmer, wool hat, goggles, helmet, liner gloves and ski mittens. 

During my years living in Europe, I bought clothes locally in order to fit in. I seldom wore shorts unless I traveled to a resort destination. Even if I went to the supermarket, I dressed in either long pants or a skirt. In Italy, my husband had a fur coat made for me because most affluent Italian women had them. During our time in Germany, I bought a one-piece ski outfit which was the fashion there at the time.  Beach time meant wearing a bikini.

During my teaching years, I wore mostly pant suits in neutral colors and lots of black pants. My mid-length hair had bangs and eventually developed a white streak in the front, so I lightened all of it and returned to my childhood blonde. I took up kayaking, so my wardrobe acquired water shoes, SPF shirts, a life vest, and baseball-style hats for the sun.

When I retired to Florida, the color palette of my clothes got brighter and I live in flip-flops. My dermatologist advised me to wear a rashguard top and swim visor for my pool workouts. When we spend time at our place in Maine, I often wear old, sometimes paint-smeared clothes for doing chores like staining the deck or weed-whacking the property. I no longer need to lighten my hair as the gray has taken over, and I sometimes use a purple shampoo to remove the yellow. I miss the blonde, but she’s still inside me.